Monday, June 27, 2005

switch switch switcharoo

changes are good...i guess...

i think i am crazy mostly....but everyone else thinks it's stress.

my family here cares about me...and are helping me cope with this feeling of complete helplessness. i now share in new opportunities this summer. different than planned. i now have the privilege of running power point, while nikki is miss. rustler and the amazing stacey hoffman refs.

i never thought this is how my last summer here (quite likely) would turn out...

i am finding it is hard to have people do things for you. i have always found it was easier to take care of yourself. and now that i can't...here i am kicking and screaming. it's hard.

how humbling it is to know people want what is best for you...and willing to change anything to help. but i know i would have done the same...

i wonder what this summer will look like. how will i grow? how will i cope? how will i heal?

god is in control. i am finding it is hard to accept it when we find out we are not.

pray for healing. pray for guidance. pray for peace.

thank you all so much for helping me. continue on even when i act like i don't need it.

man this is so sappy.

blah blah

blah blah blah

blah.

jasen is the best fiance in the whole world.

and kyle is a good fish sitter...however... i think he taught olivia how to flip people off with her fin...

Monday, June 20, 2005

here...

my computer does not receive good internet connection...hence the delay in posting...

plus i really can't find the right words...

camp starts today. and i don't feel completely connected. humm...

but i should be a good summer none the less...

keep me in your thoughts as i try and embrace normality...